Taking Pride

Try to explain the concept of pride to a child and you will discover it is a very complex thing. We believe one should take pride in achieving great things through hard work and determination. Should we be equally proud of someone born with exceptional physical and/or mental skills who lives up to their potential?

As a child I was told by my parents that they would always be proud of me as long as I tried my best. I found it somewhat difficult to reconcile failure with pride. It was confusing. Particularly in a society where the importance of winning seems to eclipse the recognition of effort in defeat.

The stunning success of Canadian athletes at yesterday's Olympic games in Vancouver have many Canadians, including myself, beaming with pride, however, it could easily have gone the other way. A miscalculation, an error in judgment, a momentary lapse in focus, these things could well have altered the outcome. Then what? Would we still be proud of our athletes, or would the post-mortem be a litany of blame and shame?

Last week, Canadian athlete Mellisa Hollingsworth made a barely detectable error on her final run in the women's luge, costing her a few minuscule tenths of a second and placing her out of medal contention. Mellisa was a favourite to win gold at this year's Olympics. After the event, she tearfully apologized for letting her country down. Her devastation was heartbreaking.

This week our local community said goodbye to a dear friend, Shelagh Culley. She was an exceptionally creative artist with a wonderful, quirky personality and an enormous heart. She died after a difficult battle with Alzheimer's disease. She was only forty-six. What most of you probably didn't know was that Shelagh had Down syndrome. The reason I didn't mention this at the outset was that, for many who knew her, this was not the thing that defined her. She didn't live her life in defiance of her condition, but rather as if it was irrelevant. The one quality that stood out beyond all others was her pride. It was a pride that required little courage on her part, she simply believed in herself, heart and soul, without doubt or reservation.

Pride can be a difficult concept to grasp. I can say that I am proud to be a dad, a husband, a Canadian, but the older I get the more I understand the implications of such statements. As a parent I discovered that pride in my children comes almost naturally, but sometimes it is hard. When they struggle, when they disappoint, when their best doesn't measure up to another, it hurts. What I've learned is that pride is not about emotion, it's about commitment. To take pride in ourselves, a person, or a nation, is to say that we stand by them regardless of the circumstance, failure or success. You are in it for the long haul.

For Melissa, and all those athletes who finished out of the glare of the spotlight, they need to know that every Canadian who takes pride in this nation shares that pride with them. It doesn't come with strings attached, and cannot be measured by bronze, silver or gold. For we all, in one form or another, represent the best of this country, in the only way we can. As ourselves.

The world is a little less rich and colourful without Shelagh among us, but without question, she has left an inspired legacy. Her life teaches us much about pride, not the least of which is never accepting what we are perceived to be and believing in who we are. We could all use a little of that.

Go Canada